A Rabbi, a Priest, and a Minister walk into a bar…
To
some degree, everyone likes humor. It
can serve to break the ice or ease a tense situation. Humor can bring people together and even help
build the relationship. Is it always appropriate? Perhaps not; like the saying
goes, “There is a time and place for everything.” In persuasion, humor can have
a place and it cannot.
In
a persuasion situation, we are often playing the attitude and likes of the
person we are trying to persuade. Some might call this “wooing” them.
Persuasion can be a lot like a game where you must play by the other person’s
rules to get the desired outcome. If
that person so happens to enjoy a good laugh, then it is possible that using
humor is a good idea. If you are dealing
with a very serious person, keeping it professional might be the right choice.
One
area of concern in persuasion is how comfortable the party you are trying to
persuade is with you. Humor can help build the rapport needed to “close the
deal.” When people laugh together, the seriousness of separation disappears,
and a bond of trust is created. You feel comfortable and safe with people who
laugh with you. Any differences seem to melt in this shared common response
(Haviland, 2005).
Once
everyone is comfortable, humor can provide that opportunity to move
forward. Ever experience that off-kilter
dead silence? The one that is usually
broken by a nervous, “Uhhh, okay…” That is something that is best avoided in a
persuasion situation, where time is valuable and any pause can be a cause for
people to get up and walk out. Humor can
be a fill for that silence but only if it is not a nervous quip. That is where humor can go wrong.
Humor
comes out best when we are confident.
Nervously spitting out the first “funny” thing we come up with can make
us look just that, nervous. Projecting confidence
is a key component in persuasion. If you
appear unconfident then your likelihood of successfully persuading someone or a
group is greatly diminished.
Another
way that humor might be effective in persuasion is by increasing liking for the
source. In particular, the choice of humor might illustrate a shared sense of
humor that hints at a similar set of underlying values (Lyttle, 2001). Think of someone you don't like. That person is probably not going to be able
to effectively persuade you on any topic.
Their opinion would matter less because you don't have an established
relationship with them. Humor can be
integral in developing a relationship.
Humor
is used all the time in persuasion.
Advertisements frequently mix humor into their messages as it increases
the likelihood that consumers will like them and therefore buy their product.
If someone finds a commercial funny they'll most likely remember the product
more. The ultimate purpose of an
advertisement is to get a potential customer to remember the company or the
product. That way when they shop, the
likelihood of them buying the company's product is increased.
There
are times when humor is not the best idea however. One example is when in a professional setting
and you are trying to persuade people you don't know. Attempting humor here is risky and can end up
backfiring. It is very possible that
even a little joke could offend someone.
Offending someone is a surefire way to end any chance of persuading
them in anything.
Another
possibility is that your joke or anecdote fails miserably. Recovering from a bad joke with your friends
is easy, recovering from a bad joke in a professional setting is very
hard. The lingering effect of an
unsuccessful humor attempt will not only resonate with the people you are
trying to persuade but also with yourself.
As said before, confidence is a key component of persuasion. What better way to self-destruct your own
confidence than to bomb like a bad comedian?
Humor
attempts are just that, attempts. It is
better to be natural in your humor.
Forced humor is very obvious. You
might spend a lot of time rehearsing a humorous anecdote in your head and when
the time comes either fail in timing or just plain fail. Now preparation time has been wasted as well
as valuable rapport building time. The
rules are simple, if you are a generally humorous person then go ahead. If you aren't, perhaps it is best to leave
out the humor and impress people with something else like knowledge or
professionalism.
Whichever
way you slice it, humor does have the potential to make or break an attempt at
persuasion. It may go over well or just
be natural and that will contribute to the persuasion. However, the attempt may fall flat and
therefore hinder the attempt at persuasion.
It is best to know your audience and only attempt humor with them if you
are 100% sure that it is appropriate.
Don't be the person that lost a big client because you tell jokes at the
worst times. Be the person who is
confident and professional and then, if need be, humorous.
References
Haviland,
J. (2005). Five ways to use humor to
persuade prospects. Corporate Visions Inc.
Retrieved from http://corporatevisions.com/blog/2005/12/31/five-ways-to-use-humor-to-persuade-prospects/.
Lyttle,
J. (2001). The Effectiveness of Humor in Persuasion: The Case of Business
Ethics Training. Journal Of General Psychology, 128(2), 206.
Retrieved from http://web.a.ebscohost.com.proxy-library.ashford.edu
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